That Someone that I Hate but Care

That someone was once my most cared and most cherished person.But as time goes by,that someone starts to leave and ditch me away.It is like I`m not important to that person anymore..and btw that someone is not my interest or wat k?..don`t think "out"..xP...I feel that all this while...I have been cheated by those words which I though mean a lot to me..all those experience and encouragement..behind all those is all lies and deceit.

The story goes like this...I know that we all have a lot of friends..and all sorts of friends.Friends who see people through their looks and appearance are really really people that you can hate for life and there are sooo...seriously mean.That someone I guess is like that..to me.I cared for that person so much but at the end...it has all come to this.That person all this while was lying to me and that person which I though was good end up like this..haihh..I wonder why..everytime I also kena like this wan..ishhh==

That someone treat me so differently then the other friends that she has.At first when we meet..she was fine with me and I was ok with her..we chat many times and talk a lot of fun things and we are like little bro and big sister.But that was before..and now...things change a lot.It all started after she saw me in person..and do you know wat she say..walao..like so slandering yet very "secret behind the words" type of message.It reads like this-"seriously..you are not what I though you are..but still it is ok".To me,the back part of the message that reads"but still it is ok" is all totally bullshit la,just words of comfort and behind all those is all lies and fake compassion.That message which me and some of my friends have decipher reads like this-she all this while though I was someone that was her expectation and like her thinking but when it all was wrong,she was like..okayyyy...=.=..nvm ba..this type of people to me is slowly will forget de..just like trash.WAT THE HELL WEI!!!!..I really was so damn angry when I know about it.But at the same time I was sad because that someone that I trust as a friend and a sister turn on me just like that,out of sheer prejudism.

I had many bad and moody times after that.I kept wondering and trying to see what I could do.I try to tell myself that everything that I have seen or heard is wrong and it is just me being over-thinking but still I though for a while and I have decided to give her a chance and try to warm up to her as a little bro and friend lo.But still..to cut this post short,many turn of events happen which pointed out that my worst fears had come true..people closest to me have just ditch me away like that.haiz=(...I was so hurt and I was kinda sad and depressed and at the sametime angry.I treat you all so nice and well but to me back is all shit and trash.Not to say that I want you to give me your best,your angel looks la and so on..be natural.But it seems that it is your natural lo..=(...finally I got to know the truth and I wish I had knew it earlier so that I don`t have to just believe and waiting for things which will never happen well to me.I don`t know why..I`m always treated liek that by people..ishhhh=(..Am I so bad-luck till like this??..huh?..>=(...Why must this things happen to me?AM I YOUR DOG TO PUSH AROUND???...DAMN!!!...Why don`t you all just tell me the truth and don`t keep saying all those lies and manipulative words so that I can scold THE HELL OUT OF YOU!!!..then I will just forget everything and be lonely as always I am..SHIT!!!...>=(

I really want to believe that you all are not like that..I really do...but I was wrong..very wrong.I want to believe that all of this was all just a bad dream but still it has become a reality.You know I find it hard to say goodbye to you..because it is never a right time to say goodbye..But I have to make the first move if not you are going to hate me and you will feel a burden in being my friend when you don`t want but you have to..I hate this kind of things..I find it hurtful and crappy.I know that someday we have to go our separated ways and it is hard but if I don`t ..it will kill me and my emotions..I know it is hard..but I have to leave everything behind of me that includes you but still I just can`t do it..listening to what my hearts wants really makes me wanna cry..I keep asking myself why!?!?why!?!?..why I take so long to say this!!!???...I just don`t want to take your time..You will understand when I`m finish and I don`t want to see you cry and break your heart..But you have broke my heart so badly..I just can`t take it any longer..I have and will do it...You are someone that I hate but still I care..but it doesn`t matter now...go away..T.T..just go..=(